NSFS: Not Safe for School, your snark-filled antidote to racism and corruption in education. Follow @postphdtheblog on Twitter and @allisonharbin_postphd on Instagram

& Psychological Obstacles to Anti-Racism

This week I’m wondering about the purpose of the “blame game,” why white people get so inordinately offended at the suggestion that they are racist, and if there’s such a thing as “nuance” in understanding the damning legacy of white supremacy in the United States. As my student recently texted me, "we don't want white teachers' pity. We want an education" PERIOT, as the kids say.

Dear friends and fam,

I think the biggest single hinderence to moving towards equity is psychological. Dismantling white supremacy starts with a willingness to have unresolved realities and to embrace the awkward gymnastics your brain does when trying to understand a complex reality you had previously taken for granted. Lemme explain.

I’ve been having a lot of, well, tedious conversations with white people of late about how even our understanding of history as “solid and factual” is actually just racism with glasses on. And as per usual, I feel like hitting my head repeatedly against a wall is more productive than trying to engage in a meaningful conversation with someone who is sure they are not racist.

So, on that note, this week’s newsletter is dedicated to all the folks who’ve tried to explain to someone why or how their actions/beliefs/bias are racist. Hell hath no fury like a GWM (or GWW!) accused of racism. It’s so exhausting, and usually, utterly deflating. But, unfortunately, that doesn’t mean we should stop trying when confronted with our racist Uncle Jeb’s dinner-table schpiel about how Libertarians are the least racist party which is why I feel that why, and no, I shan't be engaging in any discussion whatsoever about it bc I have better shit to do, so I'll be leaving those emails on "unread"). Or whatever particular bullshit the white folks in your life are fond of clinging to.

So, to all of you who've tried to have a discussion with your peeps about racism, and ended up being accused of racism yourself, here’s to you. They don’t call it a struggle for nothin’

A friend recommended I listen to a podcast episode called “Best of the Left” titled “[#1358 How A System of Power Defends Itself, A Case Study].” In it, the host talks about the interpretation of Robyn DiAngelo’s *White Fragility* and Ibrham X Kendi’s *How to be Antiracist* in the context of a particularly fraught lower Manhattan school board meeting. I loved the episode because it really got to the heart of why this will most likely be the first and only mention of Robin DiAngelo in this newsletter about whiteness (lolz she's not worth the words it'd take me to tell you why I hate her, despite that term being super great) but also about how no level of education **or 'wokeness'** can protect you from refusing to understand when you are, in fact, the problem.

The setting: a zoom meeting that became a host to a shouting match over a Generic White Man's (GWM) off-color ‘joke’ about integration and if that was racist or not. Spoiler alert: the GWM makes it worse for himself by doubling down. Any potential GWM trolls reading this: don’t do that, it just makes you the subject of entire podcasts and newsletters about how systemic racism defends and justifies itself, ffs.

This episode is a great case study in how this one particular white man, indignant over the "slander" (as someone sued for just that, I can assure you it most certainly was not that) because a white woman called him racist, really is indicative of the whole system of public education itself. As its title suggests, the theme is how white power continues to justify and perpetuate the status quo. Even in seemingly banal debates about what constitutes a racist action in a zoom school board meeting being live cast to whoever wanted to log in.

That this screaming-match of a debate, which is the meat of the podcast, was held in such a public manner really represents progress. Truly. Historically, when these conversations are had, it almost invariably results in the aggressor victimizing themselves and condemning those who spoke out as guilty of “[reverse racism]” which is not a real thing. So, this podcast has a happy ending.

They don’t call it a struggle for nothing. Also, for any fellow educators out there, you know that angrily yelling at your coworkers is just called a standard Professional Development meeting held every week after what is usually the longest and by far the worst day of the week. There’s far too much yelling in public education.

#The trouble with calling out systemic racism:

Systemic racism is hard to spot, unless it’s bombing into oblivion the world’s largest open air prison (yeah, Israel, here’s looking at you and your elision of the [metaphorical idea of Israel].

But in fact, and returning back to our particular focus on the “education system," I think it's important to make a distinction here. It is not a singular system at all. There are many education system(s) at play, and all are interrelated to other institutional systems such as the prison industrial complex, zoning, legislation, real estate, hedge funds and individuals to boot. In this way, the education "system" is more like part of a vast [machine-assemblage], consisting of other systems directly or indirectly related to the systemic organization of public education. We should not be raging against the system, but rather raging against the interconnected and labyrinthian systems of oppression, exploitation, segregation, and inequality that work in concert together to perpetuate the status quo of white supremacy.

In other words, the systemization of racism requires **nuance** to begin to dismantle. Because within such system(s), racism, and its malignant effects, happen in quiet moments or off-color jokes. The [podcast episode] rightly points out that most racist actions do not constitute a review or censure, because they are so difficult to spot.

Calling these quiet moments of racism “[microaggressions],” makes this perhaps easier to understand that these seemingly boring, lame jokes, and perhaps even banal interactions between those in power and those without. It looks like a white teacher letting slip about how “these kids” don’t want to pay attention, or have no respect for Shakespeare (ffs who cares). It happens when a white teacher decides to “wing it” rather than taking the time to plan out lessons and curriculum because, “they won’t listen anyway” or “at least they’re getting something” (Full disclosure: I am giving this example out of personal experience, because I too am racist and used to use the idea that "at least they're getting something" to justify not feeling guilty over not adequately prepping for class one too many times, despite 'best intentions')

Students, especially teenage ones, miss absolutely fucking nothing. They see everything. It’s best not to dwell too much on the reality that if you have a coffee stain, or clearly have no idea what you're talking about, or worse, a zit, as students can and will point this out with a savage ferocity. But, it is important to know that it is very much real phenomenon, even if they don't tell you aloud. Students sense when a teacher holds racist or stereotyped beliefs about who they are, and like any normal teenager/human being, don’t take kindly to people trying to type-cast them. In the classroom setting, this in turn, usually manifests in a classroom of teenagers actively invested in undermining you, your authority, and your racist-ass beliefs that you think you’re hiding. Students can smell a fraud from a mile away, and usually don’t bother to pay attention or respect the white person saying or behaving as if, somehow, BIPOC teens are “less than” what they consider to be “normal” (read: white) teenager.

Despite this, the damage is still done. Over and over, in a myriad of ways, I heard my BIPOC students echoe an internalized sentiment that they were not “smart enough” to take my class, or apply to college, or worse yet, that because they knew they were not as smart as “kids from the suburbs” (read: white kids), that they didn’t deserve an equitable education.

And this is what we call a self-fulfilling prophecy and what we call internalized racism. James Baldwin writes eloquently on the mortal danger of a Black person believing what white people say about them in many of his essays and for whatever reason the name of the one on this specifically is escaping me, my apologies for the nerds looking for extra credit assignments for NSFS (love y'all the most tho).

##In this sense, any discussion of equity in education must also include both a profound cognitive shift from their white teachers.

Part of this cognitive shift must come through a process of un-learning and re-learning history and curriculum in order to enact the profound need for a curriculum shift that seeks to celebrate Black excellence, teach Black history AS U.S. History, and properly contextualize the profound implications of the Civil Rights Movement in the context of Black and brown kids’ lived realities. Basically, we need to be teaching more Black authors, scientists, artists, and thinkers.

Yet, legislation around this has largely stalled. Now that literally even the study of race relations (Critical Race Theory) is under attack as racist itself (???) ((if only these idiots had had CRT in their education)) and thus the Republicans are bent on continuing the racist legacy of Trump and Devose's [critique of the 1619 project,] we seem no closer to enacting equity in education than we were six months ago. This critique of a methodology as well as the defunding/attempted dismantling of the 1619 project is nothing new. In fact, when public education became more systemized, it was the women of the KKK who were able to enact legislation that determines what can be taught-- many of which are still freaking in-tact today. So, as per usual, this move has been performed over and over since Black children began to be educated in what has now become what people refer to as the “public education system.”

I don’t think the education system is ever going to be divested of white supremacy. I don’t think our schools are getting “better” about racism, and I certainly don't think they're getting "better" at the actual task of educating the youths. I think they’re just getting better as masking it as something else. I’m not even sure white teachers are getting better, especially since the knee-jerk reaction of white folk is to go on the defensive when our beliefs/actions are called into question. Hell, I’m *still* debating with myself if I was as effective of a teacher as I considered myself to be at the time. And that’s a good thing.

#Dismantling white supremacy starts with a willingness to have unresolved realities and to embrace the awkward gymnastics your brain does when trying to understand a complex reality you had previously taken for granted.

##I think the biggest single hindrance to moving towards equity is psychological. White people do not want to think about hard to stomach truths.

It is far easier to skip over nuance, explain and justify away, and then, in turn, attack the very same group of people being victimized by the on-going delusions of white supremacy and the very real legislation, action, and reality of American racism.

This very issue is aptly addressed in the podcast, as [DARVO](here): Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim-Oppressor role (for peer-review about this, click [here], where the aggressor takes the role of victim. Originally derived to talk about sexual assault, it has been aptly placed into a discussion about how white people, especially white teachers of BIPOC teens, view themselves as the victims of “unruly” teenagers who “don’t want to learn” because they “come from a culture that doesn’t value education.”

Don’t believe that horseshit. In writing this, I texted a former student who I’ve been helping navigate the insanely complicated process of getting college paid for, to get their perspective. Which, I now realize, not a single one of my white colleagues at either the public or the charter school ever stopped to ask what their students thought, or why they were behaving so disrespectfully.

#Why aren’t we asking our BIPOC students what they need and how they perceive of their education? The most valuable things I’ve learned about race, racism, and teaching have come from my students.

As one student texted back to my question: “do you respect your white teachers?

> “I don’t respect white teachers who think they’re all that and yell at us all the time. Maybe I’d respect them more if they were actually good teachers, but all they do is give us boring worksheets to fill out and pat themselves on the back. We always know when a white teacher pities us, and it’s mad frustrating. Like, I don’t want your pity, I want an education.”

>

From the mouths of babes.

What I am interested in is how white education stakeholders conceive of their own relationship to white supremacy. This requires nuance. It requires bravery. It requires shutting the fuck up and listening. And then, thinking about what you just heard. And then educating yourself, and then, very lastly speaking (this is part every white person absolutely including myself usually does in the wrong order). It’s gotta be in that order, folks.

Here’s what I wish I knew my melanin-deficiet GWM friends knew:

So, next time you bristle at a “hurtful accusation” of being labeled a “racist” or “sexist” or “homophobic” take a beat. Here’s some free advice from someone who loves to troll trolls: Don’t react because it’s just going to be used against you, probably by someone like me, to illustrate how white people suck. ::ahem:: I am thinking of a particularly fragile ego of a white male family member of mine, who literally had a meltdown when I called out blatantly racist beliefs he held… as, well, racist-- and my entire family leaped to his defense. Eyeroll. This man said to me that, “Your Ad hominems will never get you anywhere.” Hmmm, me thinks this newsletter, my writing career, and skillset of teaching suggests otherwise. I’m not even sorry that I’m still not sorry. Neither should any of you also trying to do the right thing and talk to your people about racism.

But, in the rhetorical construct of a “debate” we were allegedly having about “what constitutes racism,” he forgot that ad hominmem attacks are a valid form of argument when the comments directly relate to the issue at hand. But perhaps he forgot that bit about rhetoric despite his elite private schooling. In fact, my entire family takes emense pride in being intelligent, thorough, and, of course, right (at least I come by it honestly, folks).

And perhaps there is really what I’m talking about this fluctuation between pride and shame that anyone contending with their white privilege invariably must acknowledge. Too often this vacillation between pride and shame is condemned and judged by your own fool self, as if oscillating between these two is not natural, not a part of reckoning and expanding your understanding of the world.

#What’s my point in saying all of this?

If you are sure you aren’t part of the problem, you absolutely are.

It’s ok to be ashamed of your white privilege. It’s ok to feel guilt about your white privilege.

But it’s not ok to just stop there, because your brain is desperately seeking resolution. Here’s a thought: rather than relying on “what you’ve always known” take a minute to expand your empathy skills and imagine the perspective of your opponent.

#Reparation Opportunity for the Melanin-Deficient:

Admit to only yourself that you were wrong about one thing. Sit with it. Reckon with it. Take something from it that cannot be defined as a rationalization of your actions. Resolve to do better; think deeper.

We do not know what our blindspots prevent us from seeing, so it’s best assume nothing other than that what you’ve always held to be true probably isn’t.

Until next week,

Allison

Your white savior in recovery

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